This is, without any doubt, an entry on God, about God. This is going to be one of my most open entries about God, Jesus.. No idea why. Maybe to encourage you?
I am about to step into another phrase in my life. I feel that the trials and tribulations would be of another level. I believe that I will be greatly blessed, I also expect to be tested beyond my imagination and yet still fall within God's control.
Writing this entry at 4:13am instead of sleeping when I have to wake up at 7am to reach Expo at 7:45am is an absolute illogical act of craziness. However, this is a pivotal moment. I sense that things are going to
swing up gear. Expecting correction from the people around me, expecting breakthroughs and yet also knowing that it would not be easy. Correction is a word dreaded by many and I am no exception. For me to grow, correction is just part and parcel.
Accept it, move on.
It's the week of prayer again. As I stood there worshiping and praying to Jesus, I realized how far God has taken me. Through good times and bad times, He was always there. Recently, I am hungry for more, more of His presence. It's not like I don't feel His presence and His hand moving in my life. But as compared to SOT days, its like a drizzle more than a flood.
The Holy Spirit can flood my life anytime man. For some reasons, I seriously don't feel fulfilled or satisfied spiritually. Not even with the week of prayer. Where is Your dense presence? The presence that carries Your weight?
Time to get it back. Let's do something about it.
Press deeper! I came home, got done with my idle stuff and I decided to do something I have not done for a long time. Just dedicate this time to God. Even while I'm writing this entry, I am still in that mode. Guess what, I took out my old notebook when I first came to church. Yes, I have kept the habit of writing notes ever since I joined City Harvest. I flipped through the songs, the sermons. Songs, because I was in the army and I wanted to have my quiet time during after dark hours. How was I to worship without the lyrics?
"Hope has found its home within me
Now that I've been found in You
Let all I am be all You want me to be
'Cause all I want is more of You
'Cause all I want is more of You"
"There is a longing only You can fill
A raging temptest only You can still
My soul is thirsty Lord
To know You as I'm known
Drink from the river
That flows before your throne"
Old Songs. Soooooooooo many memories.
Mistakes I had made, victories that I had won.
All of it, washed away by time. Time, your friend and your enemy.
I can't really put a finger to it but I feel that something is moving and its almost like its another chapter even before the year has officially ended. I don't get it. I pray that when God moves, I will have the capacity to pick up and follow. Years down the road, I will look back at this blog (hopefully, it'd still be around). What will I say?
"God, I remembered You, remembering me.
Thank you so much."Alright, it's 4:36am.
Time to continue.. You know these things about old songs. You kinda forget the tune.
Thank God for youtube. LOL!